Friday, November 30, 2012

Calc 2 is driving me crazy!

If I've realized at least one thing this semester it would be that I'm no engineer. The derivatives, the integrals, the partial fraction decompositions- that's just not the life I want to live for the next 2 years of my college life. Sure, in the very distant future it may all be worth it but at the moment every night looks kinda like this:
This picture isn't even particularly posed, I really have these books and notes scattered around me as I agitatedly study at the library. 
I can only ponder how it all came to this. Maybe it's the fact that I took calc 1 over the summer, at an accelerated rate so the concepts were not fully engraved in my soul like they should have been (after all, I am supposed to be an engineer, right?). Or maybe it's because my professor prides himself in having test averages around 30%. One thing's for sure, next time I'm checking ratemyprofessor.com to help me pick between the lesser of two evils.
The thing that puzzles me is that I put so much time and effort into studying. I spend countless hours writing notes at home over things we review, but each time I hang my head at another low grade.
I think much of it has to do with test anxiety. I am able to solve the same questions I miss on exams when I am reviewing, but as soon as I enter the exam room, my mind goes blank and I break into a cold nervous sweat.
With finals coming up so fast, the future of my grade for Calc 2 looks pretty bleak, but maybe with the help of  a tutor and reducing my social life to one of a hermit, I could turn it around.